Nice people get paid too 🤑

If we can’t talk about money, what can we talk about?

This is a 100% true story about money coming at you from Rachel (hi!) 

Last year, I was at a conference with my co-founder at Maneuvre, Peter, where we caught up with a lot of people and met many of our clients and connections/prospects in person for the first time.

When I was not in the room, someone we met joked to him, “You know, we weren’t sure you were real. We thought maybe Rachel made up a male co-founder to send the invoices to.” 

😬 … 😬

I am a human who likes to operate from a place of chaos, not malice. So when Peter relayed this story later, my first reaction wasn’t anger (promise). I replied, “That’s a brilliant idea. If you didn’t exist, I would absolutely do that.” 

Why? Because I dislike dealing with that side of our business. I used to think it was because I was afraid of asking for money. But I’ve come to realise it is because I am extremely protective of my worth, and let me tell you: there is such a weird silence culture around money! When someone (👋)  breaks that silence, it can get super awkward. 

And in the face of that awkwardness, I get increasingly direct until I get a direct response. 😅 When I was employed, I came to raise and bonus conversations with hard data and practised arguments to, essentially, wear them down with facts.

As a business owner, if someone is being wishy-washy about their rate, I ask for it again or tell them to think about it and send it in writing. If someone doesn’t pay an invoice on time, I will follow up exactly 24 hours after the due date to check-in.

If someone has a problem with an invoice I send, I will ask for a precise explanation of what they find incorrect. And if they can’t pay by the terms we’ve agreed on, I will insist on a clear accounting of how and when they can.

I can get very intense, and it is because I am emotionally invested in getting an answer so I know who I’m dealing with. Is it someone who doesn’t see our value, or someone who isn’t prioritising compensating us for it? I need to know so I can act accordingly.

Understandably, we learned quickly that some humans find it much easier to get money requests, have money conversations, etc., when they deal with someone who is less intense. 

In other words - someone who is not me. 

It’s multifaceted - I am sure it helps Peter is a man (and it is a separate and worthwhile topic about how outdated and awful it is that a man gets a better response than a strong, polite woman)!

But it also helps that he approaches it in a different way. While he’s as protective of our business as I am, he can divorce it entirely from the question of inherent worth. He can follow-up in a way that is more detached and, frankly, wildly more effective. 

My directness is a part of me comes from a lifetime of being questioned about my value.

His balance is a part of him that comes from knowing that what other humans do, say or pay (or don’t do, or don’t say, or don’t pay) has nothing to do with your self-worth.

So, it is no coincidence that most of the thorny questions Jade and I field and consider about money as entrepreneurs and mentors are related to how to build these parts up.

So. Let’s explore one of them today - on pay and worth!

Want advice on your own personal money-related question? Reply to this email (or drop a comment on Substack!) with your question and we may just answer it in our money-talk Q+A at the end of the month!

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Nice Work Advice on Money 💰 Money 💰 Money 💰

“I’m a full-time salaried employee at a company, and I want to get better at talking about my pay. I feel like I’m taking on more responsibility, I’m working more, and I want them to recognise that my extra effort is worth extra money. But how do I get my human-in-charge to talk about this with me, and how do I have the convo without throwing up? Help! Sincerely, Salaried Jane.”

✨Our thoughts ✨

Jade:

Buckle up, my friend. I think this is a conversation you’re going to have to lead. While an ideal situation would be your boss proactively coming to you in recognition of your extra work, with a salary bump in hand to match it, there’s a really valuable skill to be built in the reality that you’ve gotta take this one into your own hands. 

And as a side note, you needing to bring it up doesn’t necessarily mean that your boss doesn’t or won’t recognize your efforts and overextension. They may just be overwhelmed, distracted or overworked themselves. Doesn’t mean they won’t make time for you when you ask for it. Hope that’s a helpful reminder to keep this important convo from feeling too sickening. You’ve got this!

Your best assets for entering this convo will come from a little research on your end. First - go back and sift through the documents you received and signed when you began your job. You’ll likely have something that states the title of your position, some semblance of responsibilities and what salary you’ve agreed to receive for your title and job description. Compare notes - how does your workload now compare to then? Write down the differences (aka the excess).

You might do this exercise and realize that not only are you taking on more work, you might even be doing the work of a different role. For example, your title says Associate, but you're in Manager territory. Make note of that too and list out the things you’re doing that bump you up to that new title. 

Then, especially if you’ve been at the company for over a year. Dig a little on what’s competitive in the market. Look at open roles on job-search sites similar to yours in the same industry and see how salaries compare to yours. If yours is lower than average, you can bring this to their attention in a really factual way. The competitive market changes often and so does annual inflation, especially if you live in a big city. So don’t be afraid to request a pay increase that’s “up to date with the market as it stands.” Feel free to use those words verbatim. 

Lastly, tell them the increase you want. Don’t wait for them to make their own offer. You’ll be more likely to feel satisfied if you feel like you’re playing an active role in this decision. 

My final advice is the hardest part (for me). If your company can’t fairly compensate you for the extra work you’ve been taking on, be prepared to share an earnest understanding of that, followed promptly by the things you’ll need to take a step back from until they can. I know. Scary. But that’s business, baby. 

Rachel:

I believe that all information is good, even if the information isn’t positive. Example: It’s going to rain. This is information. It’s negative information if you plan to go outside, but you’d rather KNOW, wouldn’t you? Information is good because it fuels our intuition, which you absolutely need in money convos. After all, humans 👏do 👏 not 👏 say 👏everything 👏 they 👏 are 👏thinking 👏 feeling 👏 or knowing 👏. 

There’s always an element of intuition because, unfortunately, we just aren’t living in a time where we can talk about money openly. This is only MORE true in a boss/employee situation because, if you have a good boss, they filter through a lot of intel that you don’t necessarily need or might stress you out. Like bad quarterly reports, or which clients haven’t paid in six months. You become a manager when you can handle this information responsibly. 

Still, it is good to foster intuition about this + other situations because rarely in your career will you have all the facts. So, I’m answering your questions with questions (I know!) so you can practice information gathering and trusting yourself!

So, Salaried Jane! What information can you gather to turn that “feel” into a “know?” Try not to be afraid of quantifying your financial value. I can tell you for certain that a business (as an organism) will ask for it even to entertain the conversation. A raise isn’t a question of how great you are as a person - it is a question of return on investment in you. So how can we get some numbers to support that?

Next question - why are you expecting them to bring it up vs. you bringing it up? Is that because that’s the procedure? If so, fair. Or… is it because you’d prefer someone else to identify your worth instead of you having to proactively protect it? In other words - do you feel like you might throw up because your work environment is just weird, or is it because asking for money is tied to you asking for validation of your worth? I ask because if you go in there with any feelings of insecurity, the conversation is going to be really, really, really difficult. You have to know you’re worthwhile. Do you?

Related to that - it’s a recession. Capitalism is relentless. Everything is getting more expensive. How can you plan to protect your sense of worth if the answer is “no” or “not yet”, despite having the stats to back it up? Will you look for another job? Stay and evaluate in a few months? There’s no wrong decision here, except the decision not to plan for Plan B. 🙏 

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The road to a nicer workplace starts with knowing our financial value AND our inherent worth - and finding ways to protect both without sacrificing one for the other. 

On that subject, we have some news! Today, we’re announcing the launch of paid subscriptions to Nice Work 🎉 

Creating this newsletter has been a joy, and we’d love to spend even more time on it. Until now, it has been entirely bootstrapped and done on the margins of the work that pays our bills.

We know our worth is not dictated by how many of you subscribe, but we also know that what we want to pour into this newsletter has financial value (and we think you’ll agree!) 

Here’s the TL;DR of what paid subscribers get!

In addition to the weekly (free) newsletter, Nice Work paid-subscribers will get to submit questions to be answered in our monthly advice column like this one, plus get access to view all our answers each month. You’ll also get exclusive invitations to virtual events like co-journaling and “Nice Work office hours” where we jam on how to create the workplaces we want, and subscriber-only bonus exercises, downloadables, and more! You can become a paid subscriber now by clicking this cute lil’ button: 

If you’re not in a place to pay, that’s ok - you’ll still get Nice Work in your inbox weekly! It is important that the core of our work - creating nicer workplaces with nicer humans - remains accessible. That is a more than worthwhile endeavour. 💛 And stay tuned - “Money May” is just getting started.

Sending all of you big Peggy energy this week ( 👇) to go GET paid in whatever way that looks like for you!

Rachel + Jade