Here for all the awkward money questions 🫡

Kicking off our (new) monthly advice column!

Welcome to the monthly Nice Work advice column! This is a new addition that we’re rolling out as part of our pivot to paid AND freebie subscriptions. If you missed that, we talked about in our Nice people get paid too 🤑edition!

Again, we find this nice work ✨super fulfilling, and we want to keep it accessible. That’s why our weekly newsletter is staying free, which includes this advice column! 

Our paid subscribers will get one extra Q&A at the end of this email, and throughout the month will receive access to exclusive guides, exercises and events. 

After today’s edition, and after this month, we hope you are feeling much more comfortable thinking about, talking about, and negotiating for the money you want and deserve.

Money is key to why we work. It pays our bills, it funds our hobbies, it supports our families. And, ideally, what you get paid is appropriate for the hours you put in. 

Let’s get started!

We’d love your support if you’re finding our work valuable, whether that’s through a paid subscription, sharing this with a few people you think would appreciate it, or hitting that 💜 button. 

Links to share ✨

With your friend that wants a raise

With your friend interviewing for a new job

With your friend that is considering going freelance 

With your friend making bank but in a not-nice place

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Nice Work Advice Column on Money 💸 

I’m a freelancer. I’ve done my math and feel confident that the rate I quote is the rate my work is worth. But I still get shaky when someone says I’m too expensive or try to argue me down. It feels silly to raise my high hourly rate just to lower it in negotiations, and emotionally, I’m tired of defending my cost. Even still, I often give my clients more of my time than they have paid for just to keep it feeling even. It’s burning me out and I'm not sure what to do.

Rachel:

You have enough information to know your worth. Let your protective instinct use this information to, you know, protect you. 

You know you don’t want to raise your rate just to lower it. You know you don’t want to defend your cost, and you know you aren’t enjoying giving your work away for free.  You also (probably) know you’re attracting the wrong client if they’re already on the edge of being able to afford you. And that you might be settling for them + giving them “freebies” because you aren’t sure you’re worth what you’re charging. 

What could you do with the emotional energy, labour and time you’re spending in these negotiations, or in convincing yourself you’re worth it? Could you use it to make enough money to replace these relationships, or increase your efficiency so you don’t need them so much? I bet yes.

Start slow. Start doing less for free. Start confidently pitching your rate to new business. And start getting comfortable with the idea that, when you have enough new higher paying business secured, you can go to your current clients and say your rates are increasing. Give them a quarter or so before it goes into effect. If they don’t want to, then you have a 3-month notice period to wrap up. 

Jade:

I’d like to tackle this one from an optimistic perspective that your well of opportunities is overflowing, even if right now you don’t see it that way. I agree with Rachel, that sometimes there’s still a bit of “unworthiness” that keeps us smaller than we’re meant to be and chasing after the wrong clients. If you’ve got enough clients now that are keeping your finances afloat (even if what you’re paid and how much extra you work isn’t ideal), use your remaining energy to interview new potential clients with one rule: don’t settle. Instead, if you’re met with resistance on your rate or they flat out can’t afford it, share your understanding and kindly move on. You’re building your trust muscle, that the opportunities aligned for you can meet you where you’ll feel most valued, not somewhere that’s “close enough”.

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I’m a mid-level manager at a fairly large company. I have clear guidelines from HR on how to discuss raises, promotions, etc, but those don’t really help when one of my direct reports is asking for a raise too early, asking for a raise % that I know they won’t get, a title they aren’t ready for, etc. I don’t want to be mean, or be a company shill, but sometimes the answer is just - no? How do I say this/help them be realistic without demotivating the sh*t out of them?  

Rachel:

I think being direct and real is exactly what you do. Being vague might save their feelings but it won’t help them in the long-term, nor you in the short term. Because when they don’t get the raise or promotion they want, they’re still going to be demotivated. And probably upset with you for not giving them a heads up. You can do this without mocking them, being condescending, or otherwise mean. Here are some phrases to practice:

“I don’t want to upset you, but in my experience, what you are asking for isn’t realistic for this company’s environment. Here’s why.”

“I realise this information might be upsetting. But in my experience, you are not yet at the place in your career where this company would offer XYZ. Here’s why.”

“At this company, raises are only issued around [your 1-year review, after the fiscal year ends, etc - give them a specific date if you have one.] But I am glad you’re already thinking about this. Keep recording your wins, and I’ll be back in touch with our next steps around date.”

“In my experience, salary raises are usually within a range of 5-8%. I know that range is lower than what you expected, but to avoid disappointment, it is important for you to know it. Raises unfortunately aren’t guaranteed, either - I cannot promise you will receive one. But let’s work on what you need to present a strong case. Especially to be considered for the higher end of that range, start now to gather data that shows exemplary performance, initiative, and value.”  

“I know this is a lot of information and isn’t what you wanted to hear. Take some time to think about it and when you’re ready, we can have another conversation to strategise on what is a good next step for you.”

If they think you’re being a company shill or cruel for passing along realistic information, then they (not you) have some work to do on untying their salary/title/work and their self-esteem. Saying you’re not at a skill level yet to earn XYZ says nothing about who you are as a person. Saying you’re not ready for a promotion means you have room to grow, but it doesn’t mean you’re a talentless worm. It’s just information. Use it to plan accordingly.

Jade:

Within workplace relationships (and all others), I think there’s always room for a little context. As a manager, a really important part of your role is to understand where your direct reports are in terms of growth and skill, and take the time to understand their career desires so you can help them fulfill them. So, if the answer is not now, share that and let them know why it may not happen in the time frame they’re looking for. Rachel’s examples above will help! But I’ll add that it might help humanize the conversation to begin by acknowledging the high points and successes of your report’s work, while celebrating them for being brave enough to evaluate their financial worth and end by sharing that your goal is to guide them to exactly where they want to be. If the raise is out of the question now, perhaps you devise a plan together with a timeline to be on track to reach their goals in the future. 

The next and final question is for our paid subscribers - if you’d like to be one, we’d love to have you! Click here to change your subscription from freebie to paid. 

PS. Next month, we are focusing on how those hours at work can be more pleasant. Work is work, after all, but we can always find ways to work smarter, not harder. That makes work easier, which is nice. You’re also more prepared while at work, which is nice. And nicest of all: you’re able to leave work when you shut your laptop for the day. This is the stuff that makes space for the non-work part of our lives, and it’s critical.

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I just learned that my friend makes a LOT more than me. Like, 5 figures more. I am super embarrassed that they make so much more money than I do. And ever since I heard, I’ve been feeling very cold about my job. I’m toying around with applying for other roles, to see if my current job will match the amount. But I’m not sure I’d actually want to leave. But maybe I should? I guess my question is - I feel really bleh about this. What now?